26 February 2008

Through The Looking Glass

aaron is always telling me that no one knows what reality actually is. and maybe, in fact, there is no reality, only individual (and presumably inaccurate) versions based on each person's perceptions of their surroundings. i tend to vaguely agree with him in a that-sounds-reasonable- but-is-really- beyond-my-expertise- to-comment-on sort of way. after all, being completely aware of one's surroundings would require perfect information. (and all economists know that perfect information is a theoretical pre-condition to market theory. unfortunately good theory does not always translate into successful practice... for example: socialism and me operating a manual transmission.) perhaps this is why new information can be so mentally taxing -- if you are without the theoretical perfect information, any illumination can literally change your whole world by jostling around your perception of reality. especially when something turns out to be the opposite of what you previously thought.

i'll go ahead and blame my own confusion on my good honest upbringing. my mind has a really hard time comprehending why anyone would lie to me. because i don't lie to people. and even if i wanted to, there's no way i'd be able to do it without a big silly grin. (side note: i'm not sure how i manage to maintain this small piece of innocence, given that i am extremely skeptical of opinions and theories. maybe because facts are concrete, while opinions and theories require a thought process. and thought process is not something the average person can necessarily perform to my satisfaction.) still, i'm not sure i want to change the reality i live in where people are generally good, if not infallible. maybe it's OK to be jostled around a bit rather than completely change my sunny blue skies to suspicion and cynicism. i wonder whether other people are similarly happy with their false realities.

although my gut feeling after getting all this on "paper" is to reject aaron's theory as undesirable given my love of free will and rational decision-making, it actually gives a lot of power back to the individual. your existence is not concrete; instead, your reality is literally a combination of what you know and what you choose to believe about what you don't know. both of which you can change in a heartbeat.

in other news, i set my first case for trial this week. it's a child molest case (and keep in mind, my client, who is 12, is the alleged offender...) i'm sure once i regain my sleep, health, and sanity after my weekend of debauchery in stormy california, the great weight of responsibility will settle onto me. would it be so bad to cut my teeth on something less than a class 2 felony that requires lifetime registration as a sex offender? eek!

and i'm dogsitting this week. i've been here about 6 hours and so far the police have only had to come 1 time when i forgot the code that i memorized 5 minutes previously and set off the house alarm. oops.


was i the same when i got up this morning?
... if i'm not the same, the question is "who in the world am i?"
{alice in wonderland}

6 comments:

Heidi Marie said...

It is my belief that our reality is not simply what we understand of our surroundings and the world we've created by our perceptions, but it is our interraction with these surroundings and environments that defines our reality. I refuse for my "reality" to exsist only within my mind, and feel that it extends to the places I've been and the people I know. For every conversation I've had, I've impacted someone's ideas and impressions, and am certain it must all be interconnected. By the same standard that I judge others based on what they habitually do, I would be dellusional to think that my reality were so under my control. We must be aware of things outside ourselves. And I'm certain that people lie to me. But the people who do are unhappy people, and I often wonder why they are not proud of the truth regarding their lives and decisions. What a terrible feeling. (And hard to deal with as their defense attorney, I'm sure!)

Heidi Marie said...

HAHAHA - there's more!

In conclusion, I think reality could be concrete. There are just some of us who keep an open mind and quest to identify it, and others who choose to be seperate and self-centered, focusing only on personal experiences and opinions.

Kelley said...

i agree that there may be a concrete reality somewhere ... but have my doubts as to whether anyone can ever know exactly what it is.

only one thing left to do ... carry on.

todd said...

and who is this aaron that got you thinking so much? do you think the place you grew up in--where your values were established...has anything to do with your views on reality and how you see it? somehow when i think of you...i do NOT think of someone happy with their false realities.

a good case to start with, i agree, and i am sure the great weight of responsibility WILL settle in you. good luck for you and the accused!

woof! woof!

Anonymous said...

never a dull minute in your mind. glad to see you are back and relatively happy with the west coast swing recently completed. i would be happy to fill you in on the real world because, of course, i know what it exactly is (or is that only my perspective?)

Carrying on now............

Karrie said...

I am completely happy with my false sense of reality--and mostly security. I could not work downtown without it--walking to and from my car, my classes, my job all in the dark.

I think we were taught that people are generally good. It was never acceptable to lie. so why should anybody else?